While writing to my son who is at Air Force Basic Training, I decided to relate the latest news and happenings. The incident in question tickled my funny bone and morphed as I wrote and I thought you might enjoy.
On February 16th, I ambled into a deadly contest of wills that I was unaware existed in the world. Yes…naive, uninformed, peace-loving, little ol’ me.”What conflict are you talking about?” you ask. Oh, clearly one that has existed since the dawn of man and beast (well, maybe ‘flying beast’ would be more accurate). “And how did this conflict begin?” you ask. To answer I believe one must first answer the question of which came first, the bird or the egg? You can’t say? Well then, for purposes of this tale, let’s just say the conflict I find myself now fully engaged in, started at a subatomic level, when nature had a male bird take a liking to a female (And no, this is no tale of the bees, although it certainly does go where birds fancy one another…I digress).
The two did what, well…what they do…and the lady went and laid a nest full of eggs. Then one bright and sunny day (although it could have been cold and rainy), a little boy birdie emerged into the world after expending much energy breaking through his shell.
“A fine lad,” no doubt his mother chirped. “He’ll grow up to rule vast lands and territory.” And so, Red (we’ll call him), grew and one day left the nest.
Striking out on his own, he staked out territory unclaimed by any other of his kind. Four years, yea five, passed and he decided a bird new to the Hood (who stealithily appeared–‘ey rouge–only when he chanced to pass the posterior of a nearby house) would have to go.
“This territory ain’t big enough for the two of us!” he could be heard chirping at dawn.
It took perseverence and great diligence, but he showed the newcomer who was boss, he did. At every opportunity while the sun shone, Red threw himself at the foe. The adversary, while strangely quiet and flat, tempted to resist.
“Why that bird brain,” Red declared. “Doesn’t it know I’m king? I’ll show it yet!”
And so, to this very day, Red continues his fruitless quest to conquer the villian who mirrors his every move!
Isn’t it funny how levity helps us cope with situations in which we find ourselves frustrated by our lack of ability to change? This cardinal is unwilling to take the hint and there’s not a thing I can do to fix that for I’ve tried every online remedy (remove light from the window, use Glad Press ‘n Seal and more) to no avail. I’ve just attempted a last possibility of posting an 8″ x 10″ picture of my son when he was three in the window. “They” said a life size picture might scare the menace off. Alas, Red just buzzed the window once more 🙁